Night Run

Moon shine and night dew soak my tired skin Geronimo prances along the creek Knotted hair from river swims, sleeping in, and coffee grinding Bon Iver droning into the night Feet pound, quicken, with distant headlights To the woods, in and out of shadows Alert, alive, intoxicated

Deactivate

Yesterday- I got extreme. Well... let's backtrack a little. This summer has been a major decompress / reevaluate time. (Yes, if you've been following this blog for awhile you'll nod your head thinking, yep, another one of THOSE. Unapologetically - I've become seasonal.) So I left the city, and found trail running and country road cycling again : insert heart happiness. I got my older sister married... no small or easy task considering her thoughtful evaluative nature. Living in our childhood home, helping each other, sharing life together for the first time in 5 years- was epic. Because our personalities and lives are so different she makes few appearances in this blog... but you can find her story here : www.sowingseedsoffaith.blogspot.com . (Remarkable Woman) Anyway, sharing time with her, bouncing ideas around about nature, nurture, past, present, and future, was much needed in my decompress/ reevaluate process. Then, there's Outdoor Trails and my extended Botetourt - based friend family. Always uplifting and grounding. In the midst of all this is snippets of vacation - long walks along the water line of America, sun-dappled mornings through a yurt dome sky light, sipping coffee in the Confederate Capitol, and many, many hours in the middle of some great, moving, shifting waterway. Suffice to say, it's all helped me return to the basic fundamentals of being fearfully and wonderfully made. Which has made me reconsider the things I fill my life with, and the things I'd like to fill my life with. I've spent a lot of time thinking about long distance, self propelled travel - and what makes it revolutionarily great in this day and age. At it's heart (and these journeys abound in heart) is its genuineness. All my guide / planning books for the Continental Divide Trail say repeatedly - thru hiking will ruin your life. Which they mean ironically of course - because long-distance self-propelled travel not so much RUINS your life - but it distorts your values, morals, boundaries, and necessities. Probably for life. And these past few weeks, Im feeling less guilty about that than usual. I find myself unashamedly embracing the Vitamin D soaked, dynamic, joyful, adapt, improvise, and flow along lifestyle. Now - let's discuss social media. Bones and I had a charming conversation about the rigamarole bouncing around about the NECESSITY of social media. I've been toying around with having a more obscure online presence for awhile now. Wikipedia defines social media as including "web- and mobile-based technologies which are used to turn communication into interactive dialogue among organizations, communities, and individuals." But what I started noticing on the two networking sites I was on was the amount of quality friend catch up time initiated and supported by these sites was a SMALL fraction of how these sites were actually affecting me. I felt superficially accessible to relationships which likely would peruse my life, with opinion and conversation, but no engagement. Beyond the social media phenomenon I'm realizing I have little desire for superficial skimming of my life facts without engaging conversation regarding the heart of matters. Maybe I've spent so much time in retail lately I've outtalked myself. But regardless - I'm after a certain sort of connection, and not inspired to maintain less than that. SO. After a moonlight soaked mountain drive from east central Virginia back to the mountains of the southwest nook of the Old Dominion, I deactivated both social networking accounts. Which leaves me a little curious what everyone is up to - but feeling free and unencumbered to live my life present and share it discretionally. If you've come to this blog as a friend (old or new), looking to keep up with my life, welcome! send me a message! I'm going to test out the old school forms of communication - you know, Emails, phone calls... anything more archaic than that is appreciated to. And one final moonlit inspiration. One of my greatest heros was a nomadic, unmarried, with no children, jobless, wilderness wandering, house free-loading kind of soul. Jesus Christ. I love that guy. AND it blows my mind why my priorities and necessities continue to perplex a community of believers I would like to be part of, but feel so alienated amidst. Oh well. Moving forward - honestly and with my thru hike ruined life. Gracefully, Bound

Combat Rolls

Today is Low's birthday. So Geronimo and I sit on a dark Virginian wrap-around porch, the second day of summer, surrounded by lightening bugs and frog songs, listening to the entire Rumours album by Fleetwood Mac. Researching our next chapter. This spring, while in Colorado with Spencer, I had the pleasure of running into my best Environmental Studies buddy. Anna. Anna from Cambridge and Vermont, who daily shot pure maple syrup. Beautiful Anna was wrapping up her Public Policy and Health MS from Colorado State and beamed as she told of world travel plans. Different continents for each season in the upcoming year... I'll say she's mastering something... a different sort of health. And I've been SO excited for her adventures... to see what they will bring. But I found an insight of a different sort a few days ago from Anna, in the form of an F Scott Fitzgerald quote... "And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.” So I go deeper down the rabbit hole. Perfectly content to find one open window to crawl through, into the next chapter. Reaching into the dark for the same vigor and strength that took a heartbroken 18 year old girl to Montana. Afterall,it doesn't much matter which way you go... you're sure to get somewhere if you only walk long enough. So says the Cheshire Cat to Alice. I've been overcome by water lately. Paddling. Fishing. Watching. Praying. Spencer tries to coax a roll out of me and in the midst of "getting over the doubt in my eyes" I remember finesse. That finely lucid grip of guiding and understanding. Where what I want, and what the river wants are the same. And we dance. Fluidity. In the meantime... I've vowed to spend this time, these days, as if they were the last. A last adventure, a last conversation, a last Virginian summer dusk to watch lightening bugs rise out of the grass. And love every beautiful, fluid, unknown moment of it.

Spring. We are warming and warming here with temperate sunny days punctuated by chilled rains. Rivers are full enough, that vitamin D is rocking my world, and I may just be taking full advantage of the lack of work hours I've been scheduled for. Last week I snuck away to the Rockies for a whirlwind trip driving a best friend east to a Virginia return. Ahhhh the open road. Springer fever? New seasons? Wonder. Move. Breathe. It's almost like coming out of hibernation. And although this season is not void of its own challenges - as a whole the world feels warmer, brighter, and vibrant. Scheming and dreaming are inevitable and perhaps more epic stories - just around the river bend.

the birds are quiet

when the sky is dark
creaks and strains float through my window
of heavy metal grinding steel rails
a muffled whistle of man made transportation
quietened by ever growing spring leaves

Rebirth

Although this winter has been mild and mostly snowless, I found myself hibernating in a sense. Digging in those heels to hunker down into a survivor mentality of a "what must be done" focus.
I find investment levels to be high, with small daily triumphs but little over-arching payback.
And ready or not, the trees wake up.
The past two weeks have afforded me multiple epic walks - on mountain ridges, through city alleyways - with family and dear friends.
Somewhere in the steady pace of genuine fellowship while new petal blossoms rain around us I feel a new season approaching - around me and in me.
So much anxiety from this fall as winter approached is melting away while my little nook of the planet warms.
And I am grateful - for a dynamic life, the blessing of landing on my feet, and fresh opportunities.
Spring always surprises me.

even ing

In a busy life of work, class, and chasing much coveted sleep I find rare moments to recharge. The past week I've squeaked out quite a few saunters in quiet non-societal pastures and woodlands.
The day-night transition is vibrant, the moon nearly full, and I surrender worry - stress - questions. With the simple free exhale of a day's close.
In these moments I feel at home -hands in anatomical position brushing tall grass or pines - fully present - heart happy.
In this space my thoughts sometimes linger to past chapters - companions who shared freedom and landscapes with me - who know me in this way.
Fearfully and wonderfully made to rejoice in the quiet grandeur of the wild. In the stillness of a calm home.